why would i wanna break up?
Tuesday, March 9, 2010 at 6:45AM It's getting a little awkward around here. I'm breaking up with Facebook and I've already started packing up my boxes. I've been cheating on it for a little while now and I figured I owed it some truth.
Facebook,
- You used to poke me. Now, I think you're a prick.
- In a world of open-source, you won't even let me change the colors of my layout.
- You're letting a movie about you, starring Justin Timberlake, be made.
- You've become a fan page free-for-all (more on this in a bit).
- You make it my responsibility to opt-out of dozens of questions and surveys like, "What color is your heart?"
- You subversively partnered with vendors to track my credit card activity and then posted that on my profile.
So, peace.
Caught in the middle, there will be family and friends who don't understand. Some of us have only recently finally linked on Facebook.
But I gotta go, baby. I gotta go.
Let's just talk about the fan pages for a second, though. Courtesy of the worst facebook fan pages, I found a shining example of exactly the kind of celebration of moronicity I'm talking about. Six hundred thirteen thousand people are a fan of "I wet my toothbrush BEFORE I put the toothpaste on it." Let me repeat that: six hundred, thirteen, thousand.
Really.
Also, FarmVille is not the new Oregon Trail. It just isn't. I know this opinion is unpopular, but so help me if I see one more invitation to raise a virtual pig or harvest digital corn!
I should take a moment to breathe.
Okay.
Where was I? Right. I'm leaving for Virb. It might not be a long-time thing with Virb, but it's definitely cool for right now. The best part? The content it brings me isn't alerts of people becoming fans of stuff like "You Do Realize That You're Not Cool And Everyone Wants to Punch You Right??" Nope. I literally clicked twice, on "Explore" and then "audio," and found this, for instance:
And then I clicked on "Explore" and then "photos" and found this. Virb sorts through member content and highlights awesome, rather than letting it get drowned out.
I know this all sounds obnoxious; that it sounds a lot like I think I've found the cool table and I'm picking up my lunch tray and leaving what has worked for years behind. Well, you're right. That's exactly what I'm doing. I'm going to the cool table, with no pause or hesitation. Social media is supposed to be cool. When's the last time you thought, "Whoa. That's cool," when you looked at Facebook? 2005?
Reader Comments (22)
Given I didn't even join Facebook until, uhh, 2008, sometimes I still have moments of "Oh, cool!" on there. But that's moreso when an old friend finds me and sends me a friend request. Not so much the 50,000 requests I get for stupid fan pages and Farmville animals. (What IS Farmville?!?! Someone, please, explain this to me!!!!)
I've never heard of Virb. Interesting. Can we be friends there, too, please??
Sort of makes me sad now that we're actually FB friends. :(
I feel ya! Like Hannah I was a Facebook Holdout for a long, long time. I caved, obviously. It is definitely not in my top 5 online "chill zones".
I've been on Facebook since only college kids could join, and I agree that it's kind of gone downhill. I'll probably never give it up, since I kind of enjoy the ability to stalk friends I don't get to talk to as often as I'd like, but I'm definitely open to new alternatives. I like to live on the edge (of social media...a cliff, not so much)!
Am I the biggest loser on the planet because I have no idea what Virb is!? I am always the last to find out! I also can't stand farmville, but I've got a FB addiction bad. And thanks now for opening up my eyes to another big addiciton. I don't see myself breaking up with FB anytime soon, but who says there isn't enough of me to go around!? I've never been very good at commitment anyway.
I think fb jumped the shark the moment they allowed 3-party developers to build infinite amts of pointless apps. I hate that shit.
Even though I mostly agree with you (especially on Farmville), I just can't let go yet. Maybe it's just too comfortable...
huh, had never heard of virb until now.
i've banned all facebook / mob wars / whatever the hell ppl are using now from my fb page. it's awesome.
Totally with you on FB's long-gone coolness factor. It was inevitable, really; just like MySpace, it got so big and full of crap that it lost any kind of edge it ever had.
I've been exploring Vreebit myself, but Virb looks interesting too. Might just have to sign up.
I hate Facebook. Hate hate hate. I make it a mission to block every App that comes my way. You'd think it would get the hints, but noooooooooooooo.
*So* clueless.
meh. i've been feeling the same way. been on it since it was www.thefacebook.com in 2005 and i'm getting bored. thinking of getting a twitter account. but what ever will i do with all my pictures???
I joined Facebook back in the day when only college kids could join. Ahh, those were the days. I agree that Facebook started going downhill when every one and their mother's, literally, could join. Facebook is turning into a Myspace, NO!!!!! But, no matter how much I despise Facebook, I will continue to use it until all my friends leave it and join a newer and better social networking site. To top it off, my friend just referred me to Pagerage, a site that allows you to personalize your layout on facebook. Just like Myspace! This site is pretty cool though, check it out: www.pagerage.com.
I hear ya! Facebook just isn't interesting to me anymore and I'm tired of all the stupid applications, emails from FB whenever someone comments on someones status update and the need to keep everyone on your friend list. (even people who you've lost contact with awhile ago)
Blech! Virb sounds much better!
I'm with you on Farmville... and Mafia Wars, and all the other garbage that I have had to delete from my "feed" over the past months... I liked Facebook circa 2005 - clean, simple. collegiate - an excellent alternative to Myspace which was a glitter covered street walker. But I like the lack of color/layout options --- given the choice, I think most people would choose layouts that while visually appealing would be so difficult to look at/read, I would follow your suit and quit (instead of my current passive aggressive lack of activity). Have a great day! :-)
http://ShaynaLeahK.wordpress.com
I've never been in love with facebook and honestly, if my family didnt use it to keep in touch, I wouldnt have one either.
Dont even get me started on the relationship status field!!! Its like they want you to get in an argument with the one youre dating!!!!
I keep fb around because I get a perverse enjoyment from ignoring friend requests from people I haven't thought about in a decade or more.
I know. I'm a bitch.
Oh man. This is totally a FRIDAY BREAKUP! That's it. I'm making a button (dirty) and everyone's going to start following my lead and breaking up with things on Friday. Even though no one reads blogs on Friday. Because, dammit, that fit better with the Cure song.
Also, I really want to break up with Facebook because I hate it. But instead I'm just ignoring it with the hope that it will get the hint and stop calling me at 2am to make out. You SUCK Facebook. Deal with it.
Great post Brad...I agree with you. I am not sure I can break up with FB right now though...although our relationship is pretty boring these days. There is no excitement like there was when we first starting dating. I'm glad we didn't get married ;)
I'm not abandoning ship yet, but there is something really weird to me about the facebook culture, especially now that everyone is on it. Like, people leave the weirdest comments on statuses. I guess because the status would only make sense to one group of friends, but they've got all their friends there and their parents and grandma and camp counselor and boss. I have to use facebook a bit for one of my jobs and now I'm getting creepy messages from guys just because we study the same kind of philosophy. Facebook is just weird.
i never trusted facebook..mostly cause i never trusted my ability to master it... and lately i reallly feel like never joining was sooo the right decision... i just never realllly cared if the dude behind me in Dr. James history 101 class ever finds me... and im ok with that....
xoxo
Just dumped 'facebook like 2 days ago and i love your blog. Hate the addictive apps and the annoying ones and hate the stupid 'wall that shows all your business...umm, thats why you have friends and dont reply to all of facebook. Never heard of Virb but going to look into it. I saved all my pics and said cya to fb and its drama.
yeah, I've pretty much dumped facebook too. I hardly ever sign on and check it and I only started my account a year or so ago. Once you've caught up with old friends, there really isn't much else to do. I keep mine as a sort of contact list/address book and that's about it. agreed.